http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3659388
the martian was ok. they chose to tell it largely via the martian's video blog, no doubt influenced by the similar gimmick of the mission log used by the book. they made it work, mostly by supplementing the video log with normally-shot scenes, but it was pretty awkward. it did do a good job of breaking up the storytelling to let matt damon get introspective and add some humour. too much winking at the camera, but i appreciate that they gave it their best shot.
if i had to point at just one thing that i liked, it would be the technical accuracy. most movies that get technical fall down so hard that you can tell they blew it with your high school physics knowledge, but i think you would have had to had some fairly specific knowledge to see the bugs in this one. the standard is so low, you do not really have to do a good job with technical accuracy, so i really appreciated it here. i did not read the book, but my understanding is that the kudos should mostly be shoved in that direction.
the martian gets three slingshots and a velocity match. hi chewy!
2015-10-12
the guest
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2980592
the guest opens with a series of ridiculously sinister scenes that make it crystal clear that you are watching a "thriller" and that the bad guy is "the guest." it was just so comically done (not comical on purpose, unfortunately) that i have to acknowledge that it happened before i get on with the review proper.
i was 100% certain, based on the movie poster, that i was going to be seeing a bradley cooper movie. and you know what? i was in the mood for it. so you can imagine my surprise and chagrin when i instead found myself watching this total shitfest that did not have bradley cooper in it. the only real draw was that adolescent sense of justice where an overpowering force can sweep in and make all the assholes pay in some way that satisfies a thirteen year old's sense of poetic justice. the bar-bound jocks got beat up in a bar fight, the principle was thwarted by legal/administrative mumbo-jumbo, the gun dealer got shot with his own gun, and the hail-of-bullets thugs were taken out in a righteous storm of gunfire. the only one that did not really fit the pattern was the hot friend who took a bullet in the chest as an apparently extreme form of slut-shaming. UNJUST, saith schmolli.
oh, the music was also pretty good, but you have to be in the mood for the kind of goth music thirteen year olds listen to.
the guest gets one in the chest, as i turn the tables and do a little shaming of my own.
the guest opens with a series of ridiculously sinister scenes that make it crystal clear that you are watching a "thriller" and that the bad guy is "the guest." it was just so comically done (not comical on purpose, unfortunately) that i have to acknowledge that it happened before i get on with the review proper.
i was 100% certain, based on the movie poster, that i was going to be seeing a bradley cooper movie. and you know what? i was in the mood for it. so you can imagine my surprise and chagrin when i instead found myself watching this total shitfest that did not have bradley cooper in it. the only real draw was that adolescent sense of justice where an overpowering force can sweep in and make all the assholes pay in some way that satisfies a thirteen year old's sense of poetic justice. the bar-bound jocks got beat up in a bar fight, the principle was thwarted by legal/administrative mumbo-jumbo, the gun dealer got shot with his own gun, and the hail-of-bullets thugs were taken out in a righteous storm of gunfire. the only one that did not really fit the pattern was the hot friend who took a bullet in the chest as an apparently extreme form of slut-shaming. UNJUST, saith schmolli.
oh, the music was also pretty good, but you have to be in the mood for the kind of goth music thirteen year olds listen to.
the guest gets one in the chest, as i turn the tables and do a little shaming of my own.
the raid 2
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2265171
since they called it "the raid 2", i thought i was going to see another 10 minutes of exposition, followed by wall-to-wall fighting. however, it was actually just a normal action movie that was not very good. most of the action was implausible flailing, though it was a downright pleasure to watch cecep rahman work. i mean, really. there was a scene where he did nothing other than walk out of a room, and i was completely captivated. the man's balance and posture were amazing.
the raid 2 gets two ridiculously sharp hammers.
since they called it "the raid 2", i thought i was going to see another 10 minutes of exposition, followed by wall-to-wall fighting. however, it was actually just a normal action movie that was not very good. most of the action was implausible flailing, though it was a downright pleasure to watch cecep rahman work. i mean, really. there was a scene where he did nothing other than walk out of a room, and i was completely captivated. the man's balance and posture were amazing.
the raid 2 gets two ridiculously sharp hammers.
the raid: redemption
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1899353
the raid's main claim to fame is that after about 10 minutes of exposition, it is about 80 minutes of pure action. this is harder to pull off than you might think. i have only seen this done in a few other films, one good (bangkok knockout) and all the rest bad. the raid is unfortunately one of the bad ones. if you saw the trailer, then you saw most of the good bits. the action is overly obscured by overuse of my arch nemesis, the shaky cam, presumably so they could hire cheaper stuntpersons. the plot is tired and obvious and sounds like the kind of thing you might have dreamed up when you were in high school and fighting your way though an entire building of people was a super cool way to spend a lazy saturday afternoon. characters were just there to do fighting, so do not look for "dimensions" or "development" or anything like that.
the raid gets one plate of "stinky bean".
the raid's main claim to fame is that after about 10 minutes of exposition, it is about 80 minutes of pure action. this is harder to pull off than you might think. i have only seen this done in a few other films, one good (bangkok knockout) and all the rest bad. the raid is unfortunately one of the bad ones. if you saw the trailer, then you saw most of the good bits. the action is overly obscured by overuse of my arch nemesis, the shaky cam, presumably so they could hire cheaper stuntpersons. the plot is tired and obvious and sounds like the kind of thing you might have dreamed up when you were in high school and fighting your way though an entire building of people was a super cool way to spend a lazy saturday afternoon. characters were just there to do fighting, so do not look for "dimensions" or "development" or anything like that.
the raid gets one plate of "stinky bean".
slow west
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3205376
slow west was kind of like what would happen if wes anderson did westerns, which i guess is a thing he will probably get around to one of these days. also, if you are wondering whether i am feeling pretentious today, the answer is yes. obviously. but it is a kind of charming pretentious, like a wes anderson movie.
so anywho. was it good? well, maybe? do you like wes anderson movies? i tend to come away from them feeling just a little charmed, but bored, and i got that same thing out of slow west. even the funny parts were charming+boring, which was quite frankly weird. also like a wes anderson movie, the characters were mostly caricatures with arcs drawn by a child in crayon and the plot followed a straight, if not totally obvious, line to the conclusion. so i guess what i am saying here is that this was more or less a wes anderson ripoff. even the name, right?
slow west gets two royal aquatic moonrise hotel limiteds.
slow west was kind of like what would happen if wes anderson did westerns, which i guess is a thing he will probably get around to one of these days. also, if you are wondering whether i am feeling pretentious today, the answer is yes. obviously. but it is a kind of charming pretentious, like a wes anderson movie.
so anywho. was it good? well, maybe? do you like wes anderson movies? i tend to come away from them feeling just a little charmed, but bored, and i got that same thing out of slow west. even the funny parts were charming+boring, which was quite frankly weird. also like a wes anderson movie, the characters were mostly caricatures with arcs drawn by a child in crayon and the plot followed a straight, if not totally obvious, line to the conclusion. so i guess what i am saying here is that this was more or less a wes anderson ripoff. even the name, right?
slow west gets two royal aquatic moonrise hotel limiteds.
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