2014-04-25

gi joe: retaliation

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1583421

this gi joe movie was no better than the last one.  this is the kind of movie that features ultra-elite soldiers who are mostly elite at slow-motion walking while ill-advisedly pointing their high-powered rifles at their commanding officers.  "woops."

is there anything good?  well, THE ROCK.  but that is about it.  even THE ROCK cannot pull this one off, though.

gi joe gets one ridiculously under-armoured tank that is somehow able to take out three supergun tank things.

doomsday book

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2297164

doomsday book is a set of three vignettes about the end of the world and what happens afterwards.  it turns out that life goes on.  this should not come as a surprise to anyone, especially if they read smbc.  the individual stories had good variety amongst themselves and presented some interesting viewpoints, but they were a bit choppy and i could not connect to any of the characters.

doomsday book gets two doomsdays in dead tree format.

blitz

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1297919

jason statham is a bad police officer.  luckily, the tired and predictable plot of this tripefest called for a bad police officer.  unluckily, the plot called for him to be bad in a moral sense, not just bad at his job.

blitz gets one whatever.

2014-04-11

jackass presents: bad grandpa

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3063516

bad grandpa is a movie that lets you know what is going on right from the start.  and let me tell you, what is going on is bad.  this is the kind of movie you use a word like "travesty" on.  who even watches these things?  oh, right.

bad grandpa gets one multi-state shooting spree.