solomon kane

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0970452

(second in a series of fever-induced reviews.)

i heard that solomon kane was a classic, but it seems to me that the person who told me that needs to be severely punished.  this was just a normal pile of crap.  bad writing, bad acting, eye-rollingly bad plot, and plot twists that were in no way surprises because of the clear signage for miles ahead of them.

you might be thinking to yourself that i misheard the recommendation, and that it was a recommendation for *citizen* kane, which actually is a classic.  but no.  the recommendation came complete with imdb link and picture of box cover.  and besides, i do not care.  someone needs to pay for this outrage.

solomon kane gets one witch-boy.